Olivia Sparkles!

Olivia sparkles. From the moment she became a part of our family, a little over a year ago, Olivia has sparkled. But I don’t think it started in that moment. I think it started the moment she was created. In fact, I think God creates us all to sparkle, it’s up to us to decide whether we will live the way He created us to live.

Olivia sparkles. This fall we celebrated her third birthday. It was her first birthday with us. We also celebrated the anniversary of our first year together. Additionally, we celebrated our first Thanksgiving with our larger family and as each event comes and goes, I become more and more awed at what an amazing little girl God has blessed us with. She brings laughter and joy wherever she goes. In fact, she kind of takes over any room she is in! “I’m here” she seems to proclaim, “Let the party begin”!



Olivia sparkles. Who would have ever thought one little girl, from so far away, could bring so much life and love to a family?

Mommy wants to sparkle too. I want to live with the joy and abandonment that I see Olivia living, no matter what the obstacle. Olivia has endured and overcome much. And yet she never stopped sparkling. I pray as we begin this Christmas season, that you will experience some of the sparkling joy and childlike excitement that is so present in Olivia, and in all of our children.



Mommy bought Olivia a very sparkly dress for Christmas. I think I’m going to go out and buy one for myself too!

Lessons from an almost 3 year old...

So I’m learning some pretty good lessons from my almost 3 year old. When you want something really bad, throw a tantrum. O.K., just kidding. That’s probably not the best lesson. But there is something to be said for throwing your head back and doing a little pounding and kicking every now and then!

Thankfully, my almost 3 year old doesn’t tantrum very much. Instead she pouts and I was already really good at that one. So let’s get to the good lessons.

Lesson One: When my almost 3 year old see’s the people she loves she gets so excited she either does a little happy dance, or she throws something as she just can’t contain her glee (Again, the throwing maybe not such a great idea…but you get the picture)! And then when that same person disappears for a moment (e.g., a trip to the potty) she says “uh oh, no no”. She not only loves her people inwardly, she displays that love and affection outwardly. Some of us as adults are pretty good at showing people how much we care about them. I must admit, I’m not always so good and need to become better.

Lesson Two: My almost 3 year old laughs, and laughs and laughs. In fact, sometimes she’s the only one in on the joke! But oh, what a precious lesson. When did we as adults become so guarded and cautious? Why is it sometimes so hard for us to just be silly? Yes, I know we have responsibilities and life is sometimes very hard. But we were created to LIVE life, and to live it abundantly! Not to just somehow wander through it. In our break room the other day at work, when asked how her day was going I heard a woman say, “I’m hanging in there, that’s about all we can ask for I guess.” NO! We can ask for more! I know I need to laugh more. I need to throw my head back and laugh until my belly hurts!

Lesson Three: My almost 3 year old loves spiders, lizards and all creepy crawling things. Alright, not really a lesson here either but its FREAKIN’ ME OUT! Maybe there is a lesson here, when did I become such a scare-dy cat?? Come to think of it, my almost 3 year old will try just about anything and everything. Now thankfully, she has a mommy to tell her when she needs to NOT try something (!) but think about it. Remember when the world and all things in it were cool and worth exploring? When did that change? I know for some, it hasn’t changed and those of you who are still out there exploring and trying new things, I am in awe of you!

I'm excited to see what my almost 3 year old will teach me next. Stay tuned...

Parents everywhere....I salute you!

So I’m pretty sure most parents would agree that their children are the most amazing children in the world. And I’m pretty sure each one of those parents is absolutely right. In fact, I think it’s one of the gifts God gives to parents…the ability to see their children the way He sees them. We see the sweet and tender side, we see the goofy, silly side, and at times we see the naughty side. Yet no matter what side our children are displaying at that moment, they never cease to amaze us. And we love them.

I feel as if I’ve been doing this parenting thing for such a short amount of time compared to most who will read this. And many of you may have gone through some pretty tough trials and tribulations with your children. And I would guess there are moments, or days or months that you would like to erase from your memory. Maybe hardships you wish your children didn’t have to go through. Or hardships your children brought into your life due to decisions they made. But whatever has happened, or whatever will happen, you see your children like no one else can, and you love your children like no one else can.

Olivia and I have only been mother and daughter for 10 months and though I know almost nothing about the first two years of her life, I know much about who my daughter is. I know that she loves to laugh and that her laugh is infectious! I know her heart is good and full of empathy and gentleness. I know she is determined to get words out when her little mouth is preventing her from doing so. And I know I am going to do everything in my power as her mom, to help her to continue to grow and experience life and love. What an amazing gift it is to be a parent.



I never knew how hard it would be to be a parent. And I also never knew how your heart just changes when you become a parent. It becomes softer, squishier, and more willing to change for the good of your child. I think I am learning what it means to love unconditionally.

And I salute all parents out there who already know this and live this. YOU are amazing.

I want to leave you with the words to a Michael Card song from one of Olivia’s cd’s. It brings a reminder of those who watch over our children as they sleep and I think it brings peace whether your child is 3 or 23.

”Oh, unseen warriors, brothers, friends. Who for our safety we depend. I ask you now to come defend, this precious little baby.
I know you’ve been here all along. And will remain her whole life long. But with this simple childish song, I ask you, guard this baby.
Sometimes at night she will awaken. Let her not feel fear forsaken. To every saint your visit paid, you always said, 'Don’t be afraid'."

1st Speech Evaluation

After a WONDERFUL six month period with NO doctor’s visits, we once again headed down to St. Paul to see Olivia’s cleft surgeon. There is the possibility that she will need a 2nd palate surgery to correct some structural issues with her palate that may be affecting her speech.

She is not doing much talking yet but she sure can belt out some good sounds! Sometimes I think she’s actually just talking in another language, German or Japanese maybe? Oddly, it doesn’t sound at all Chinese!

The surgeon determined that she is not speaking enough yet to make a decision about a 2nd surgery and so she will be starting weekly speech therapy with the cleft team through Gillette next week. The speech therapist who did who her initial speech evaluation wrote, “Olivia has a delay in her expressive language skills and her speech production skills. At this time, her resonance has a hypernasal quality and nasal emissions were heard during attempts to imitate single words” (this hypernasal quality is something not uncommon for children with cleft palate and oftentimes is a red flag for additional palate surgery).

The speech therapist also recommended we initiate speech therapy through the school district at this time (in addition to the care she’ll receive at Gillette). So we’ve scheduled an initial visit with the school system and they will be sending out a speech pathologist, the school nurse and an early intervention specialist right after Labor Day. In addition to evaluating Olivia’s speech needs, they’ll do a development evaluation on her.

It all seems a wee bit overwhelming, but at the same time I’m happy that this part of our “cleft journey” has begun! I’m so looking forward to hearing Olivia begin to enunciate words. Even though she can’t talk much yet, she sure can communicate. I often get the “I’m bored” look or the “I’m not going to listen to you” look. And it’s amazing how well she can say “NO!”

In 6 months, we’ll once again return to her surgeon and determine next steps at that time.





It's hard to believe summer is quickly drawing to a close. It's been so much fun to watch Olivia try new things, make new friends and explore all that is wonderful about MN in the summer!

Blessings to you!

A lesson in fear and contentment...

My daughter woke up at 4:30 this morning crying. It wasn’t an “I’m uncomfortable” cry, instead it was a scared cry or a sad cry, I’m not sure which. We rocked for a little while, read a couple of books by the light of the nightlight and got a drink of water. Then I laid her back down in her bed and covered her with her soft blankie. She lay on her side, holding onto her favorite book and closed her eyes as I rubbed her back. She fell easily back to sleep with a smile on her beautiful little face.

As I walked back to my own room, I was a little in awe at the peace and contentment I saw on her face as she was falling back to sleep. From the moment she was brought into my life, I’ve been praying that she would feel safe, that she would learn to trust and that she would know how much she is loved. I thank God for answering that prayer.





And then I started thinking more about the contentment and peace that was so evident in her countenance. She woke up feeling scared or sad and what did she do? She cried out. Her mama came into her room and comforted her and soon she was laughing and contentedly falling asleep once again. She knows she is safe and taken care of. She knows she is loved. She trusts me. So I thought to myself, “How many times do I wake up in the middle of the night feeling sad or scared?” For me as an adult, it generally takes the form of anxiety and the “worry thoughts” sometimes keep me from falling back to sleep. So what is keeping me from crying out to my heavenly Father and allowing Him to comfort me? We have this God who tells us over and over and over in His Word not to worry. “I’ve got it all under control! Trust Me! I love you to pieces and will ALWAYS take care of you!”

If I could truly understand what that meant, if I could truly trust Him, I think I too could fall asleep with a smile on my face.



“But blessed are they who TRUST in the Lord, whose confidence is in Him. They will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit” Jeremiah 17:7-8a

So many "firsts"!

It's been a Spring and Summer full of "firsts" for Olivia. Her first ice cream cone, her first Merry-Go-Round, her first concert, her first visit to the zoo, her first wedding, her first road trip and her first graduation parties!


It turns out she loves everything that is summer...including playing in the dirt, playing in the water and playing with rocks.

It's so fun to see life through her eyes. She is so full of joy and laughter and she has a way of making everyone around her enjoy life too. Thank you Little O!

Six months ago...

Dear Olivia,
Six months ago I saw you for the first time and was amazed at how beautiful you are. Six months ago I held you for the first time and prayed that you would feel safe. Six months ago I fed you for the first time and you ate all that I offered. Six months ago I changed your clothes for the first time and you laughed. Six months ago I put you to bed for the first time, and then I stayed awake all night, watching you sleep. Six months ago my life and your life changed dramatically. Six months ago I became your mom, and you became my daughter.

I knew our lives would change, but I had no idea how much you would change me. I had no idea that I would see myself more clearly because I was a mom. I had no idea that I would want to become a better person, so that I could become a better mom. I had no idea that you would teach me what it means to love unconditionally. I had no idea that because of you, I would see God more clearly. I had no idea that He would use you to sanctify me. I had no idea that I could love one little person, so very much.

God gave me the most amazing gift when He put you in my arms six months ago. It’s been six months my sweet girl. We have so much more to learn about each other, and I can’t wait.

I love you very much,
Mom